bissful depth diver

"I must be a mermaid Rango. I have no fear of the depths and great fear of shallow living."

anias ninn

I must be a mermaid then, too.  This is what I have come to understand from the first time I read this quote by Anais Ninn.  While I love to dance and sing in the sun, I also am called by the subtle but powerful pull of the moon.  Were we all the same, with the same purpose on this Earth, in the life, what a lackluster existence we would have. As the saying goes, we need all the colors of the rainbow, each streaming into the next, and offering us a new light through which to see the world.

For us to be inspired, we require different muses at different times along our journey.  I have had great teachers who helped me to be more gentle, just as I have had those who have modeled power.  At different times, each called to me for exactly what and when I needed to transform.  There are so many amazing teachers and guides leading our revolution of higher consciousness through their Joy and Light.  They teach us how to look to the light, raise our minds and open our heart into a vibration of love.  There is a richness and a much needed up-liftment from the shallow, surface, sleepwalking many of us have been programmed into.  Many suffer from chronic issues, physical, emotional and spiritual, from which joy, laughter and community is the medicine.  And many live in a kind of numbness, disconnected from true joy or sadness. I am forever grateful to that medicine that lifts my Spirit to it's heights and those who imparted it to me!

And yet, for me, in this life, as joyful as I am most of the time, I must be a mermaid of sorts, according to Ninn.  I marry my light into the depths and shadows of Soul exploration. What breaks my heart open into a greater love, are the mysteries of our lives and our deaths, the bitter-sweetness of the change that cause us to stop and look within.  There is a Beauty and a Joy present in being able to touch my own sorrow and help another to touch theirs. There is an ache within, that is a blessing, as it always calls me into my own center where I find my deepest connection to God/Goddess. 

Through the years of meditation and yoga practice, the light and shadow have found peace with one another.  I can't live with just one. I wouldn't want to. The gift that this has given me, is the ability to hold space for those in pain, suffering, ill or dying.  We all experience loss and many suffer. I believe suffering is  an option, which I also don't hold a negative meaning to the word. I don't always remove myself from it, so that I may learn from it.  It is a gift to not feel I must shun my own pain, escape it or make it go away.  This is the gift I  have the opportunity to share with others.

Because I am able to befriend my own shadow, meet it consciously, with love and compassion, I can be of service to others in these times of need.  Going on a journey into our depths frees us up to be more present in our dancing and singing in the sun. 

Many are still frightened by those times Life calls them 'down'. It is a cultural habit of ours to find the 'feel better' fix, without recognizing and appreciating the need for diving into the depths!  So, thanks to all those who have given permission to listen to what kindles my flame and amazing teachings to illustrate the Joy and Bliss hidden within the shadows!

All of you who keep shining the light ~ many thanks! and those of you who are blissful depth divers or those feeling nudged to awaken through that healing power, let's bring the polarities of the light and dark into Union, that we may discover our Wholeness!

Learning to See by Byron Lindley

LEARNING TO SEE

She learned in ways

uncivilized by man

the books they gave her

couldn’t speak

to the heart

the jumble of words

twisted inside

covers of cardboard

confuse the mind

let’s go outside

converse with stars

listen to leaves

whisper secrets

along strings of time

blown on a breeze

she could feel the Earth

beneath her feet

holding her up

with delicate strength

a gentle giant

like a teddy bear

who’s been abused

by generations of insensitivity

but she can feel

the pain

and the joy

present within

each moment of time

not wasting them

in sterile classes

built on equations

authoritarian

memorization

detention

for speaking with  angels

do what you’re told

the prize at the end

a piece of paper

she couldn’t comprehend

their consternation

and they

were just as baffled

when she said

I want to be here now

but what of your future

they cried

with hand-wringing concern

it never comes

she replied with a smile

walked outside

to sing to the grasses

blowing and growing

in meadow classrooms

beyond the lies

of a world gone mad

taught to pupils

with Ritalin eyes

forced conformity

in old fairytales

that make no sense

in the language of truth

we learn the hard way

when Babylon falls

but she already knew

when she came in

that tress and stars

hold more wisdom

than wars of fear

and religious dominion

take me away

from insanity

I’ll follow the breeze

on the music she sings

of ancient souls

calling you in

time to begin

healing within

Mother of time

forgive our sins

one and the same

she touches the Earth

a little girl

with healing hands

my faith renews

I smile inside

through the darkness

a new light shines

copyright by Byron Lindley

from ‘A Portait of Soul’

cycles of Ma Nature

The season of Spring-time is approaching and new life is abundant. We see this in the rituals and tales of the traditions of Mother Nature. This year, the first day of spring reaches us on Tuesday, March 20, 2012.  This day is one of only two days of the year, in which our day light and night time is the same length of time. In the pagan path, this holiday is named Ostara, for the Goddess Ostara.  It is the celebration of the returning light, warmth, time for planting and the rebirth of nature, after the long cycle of winter.  Easter eggs have been a symbol of this season to signify fertility and the birthing of new life.  We also see that Christianity, in it's effort to bring paganism into 'it's accord', celebrates Easter (or Eostre in the Germanic language) to symbolize the  rising of Christ 3 days after his crucifixion on the cross. 

In all of life's cycles, we witness, birth, life and death.  Plants grow, give their fruit, and return to the earth, reviving the soil for the following cycle of life.  Nothing really is born or dies, there is just a change of form. Seasons change bringing us the Spring of new life, the Summer of sustenance, the fading of Fall, and the death and hibernation of Winter. Day and night cycle light and dark, sun and moon, wakefulness and sleep.

Even our man-made structures, over time begin to crumble to the ground, experiencing the pull of gravity back to the earth. (Of course, there are man-made objects that unfortunately defy this cycle, and as we know create difficulty within our material world. There is something to be learned here, and yet, someone else is much more equipped for that conversation.)

If we are a part of nature and her living order, what is it that leads us away from the harmonizing and balancing of her ways?  If we pay attention, we can witness in ourselves the push and pulls of these larger cycles, as well as the minute ones within our being.

On the grand cycle, we are born into Spring.  We relish the blossoming into the sun of Summer, which is a lengthy season of our life.  Eventually, we feel our inner Fall approaching, and inward dance attempts to catch our attention.  And finally, for everyone, Winter will arrive to bring us into our core Self and the body will return to the Earth. 

And what happens on the smaller scale of our internal/external cycles?  I will venture to say that the majority of us are put off by the onset of the Fall and Winter of our existence on the grand scale of things.  So, I have to wonder, does that anxiety or fear of the 'big Winter', carry over to the smaller cycles which attempt to call us within? And do we understand the importance of the life's cycles and rhythms that bring us in from fun in the sun?

Technically we are still in Winter.  If we haven't yet, we still have an opportunity to explore the gifts of what Winter can share.  When we hear a call from within, a call that is asking us for rest, inner quiet and reflection, can we respond to it, instead of getting a cup of coffee, a 5-Hour energy drink, or going for a run, in order to soften into that gentle inner voice.  Find a quite nook with a warm cup of (non-caffinated) tea and a lovely window to simply sit and watch nature. Here in Los Angeles it can feel like Summer most of the time. However, when my mind just doesn't feel like working, I do my best to honor that cycle my body is expressing.  I take a blanket out into the yard, stretch out with the warmth of the sun bathing me, and listen to the birds and watch the breeze through the trees.  Even if you feel like taking a relaxing hike along a trail,  at some point - STOP,  find a place to sit and be.  There are times that even the tiniest thing we 'do', interferes with the magic, beauty and power of BEING.

It is in these moments of allowing the nurturing of 'down time' that without 'doing' anything, the Soul has an opportunity to communicate with us.  As our body slows, the breath slows, stress is released, and the heart begins to open and a sweet song sings forth.  This is a song that we have to become still and quiet enough to hear.  It is a song of Soul, that connects us to what is true for our being.  However, if we are to hear it's message and tune, we must stop.  We must become still ~ consciously and with wakefulness.

We are always dying to things.

We're always shedding everything

in order to be fully alive 

& resurrected at every moment.

unknown

Healing come to us on all levels with this kind of practice.  It reminds us of our wholeness that is always present in spite of our doing to become whole, productive, and proving our existence.  This healing softens our beliefs and ideas, it brings us close to our fears so we can be freed of them.  Too often, too many of us  move through our days like a kinked hose or a knotted rope, without realizing this.  Illness happens here, blocking the organic flow that heals.  The mind becomes rigid with too much information because we don't give it an opportunity to unload what is really not necessary.  Emotions become convoluted and confused without the stillness and consciousness to be present to what we are experiencing.

This is the healing that the cycles of Fall and Winter bring.  It is an internal time when what is no longer needed dies away, what is needed has time to integrate into our heart. Our lessons are digested.  We are revitalized and prepared for a re-birth, for Spring, to not only dance in the light but become the Light!

We can not always live in the light of Spring and Summer, without the balance of Fall and Winter.  And just as night and day are alive and well in all seasons, in all days, this is an invitation to listen inwardly to the cycles of nature balance within you.  Treat yourself to the nourishment of those times of peace and quite.  Relish in the full spectrum of emotions and let them flow through and cleanse you!  This may last for a day or only an hour.  It may show up once a week or once a month.  Let go of the fight of the mind to 'keep going', become conscious of the stories you hold and allow those realizations to bring healing as well!

Prepare for the full light and birth of Spring, by surrendering and softening into the last days of Winter!  Gift yourself with the aliveness of your inner world, your Souls call, the process of integration, maturation and rejuvenation!  Experience the "Ahhh" of emptiness. You will blossom in all realms of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual as you tune into this new dance.


Spring Blessings ~