I personally, will be the first to admit that I am a pretty Yang kinda gal. My constitution is pretty airy/mental and firey/intense and driven. At one time I relished this in myself. I felt efficient and in control. And then, it stopped working for me or making sense to me. I realized I could use all the watery-ness I get! In the past and sometimes recently, the tendency has been to be nabbed by the Mother or to collapse into Her, because I had worn myself out. I am, however, pleased to say this has been in process of changing for quite some time. As I release more of the overt drive and allow myself to feel the embrace of the Feminine, I allow myself to be transformed.
One of the problems with intending to move through life in a more graceful, calmer way, is that this doesn't always go over too grandly with the vast majority. Yet, this upset brought on by a slower, calmer, more fluidly chaotic, yet present way of being is proof of our masculine programming that we as women have taken on. Today as I was in morning traffic, it was two women honking and yelling at the car ahead of them. These cars had absolutely nowhere to move. The impatience and anger that is only too alive and well, is a clear path of killing ourselves slowly. This is simply an everyday occurrence in any city, the reactions of both men and women, because our society is revved to the 9's in tension and unhealthy contraction.
The sadness is, that as women have adopted these roles to match our counter-part, to 'make it' in a man's world, we have lost our ability to be a source of balance, nourishment and nurturing that is so badly needed. We lose our ability to reflect these qualities back to one another. Even those of us who try so hard to be on a balanced path fall prey too easily once we leave the yoga class or leave the bliss of the massage table. Many turn to the escape of the computer, FB, Twitter, etc. and see this as a vehicle for relaxation. However, we are still engaging in a doing mode, we are not emptying out or nurturing ourselves. We are simply distracting ourselves for the time being and not connecting to our deeper heart or Soul.
It seems that if we are really to be able to shift the larger paradigm, we women must strive to find the moments of 'coming down' from the masculine high. What is called for is the need to go within, dive within. We need to find that ability to roll around and luxuriate in moments of non-doing, emptiness, quietude, our own sweetness. Find the bliss of bubble baths, soothing music, or sitting under a favorite tree . . . without something that needs to be done in X amount of time.
This shift begins with each of us as we find the courage to say 'no' to the paradigm that is non-sustainable to the wellness and Wholy-ness of our being. I have found this to be a challenge myself, especially if I have been on a binge of proving, controlling, doing. Think about how that mode of life feels in your body. I know for me, I feel the chemicals coursing through my blood and brain. It's like a drug! And it takes awhile to come down. There was a time when it took a conscious effort to remind myself that it was OK to simply be quiet, be still and take care of myself, without feeling guilty. I am so happy to say that old guilt has pretty much gone out the window! When I fall into this less familiar tendency these days, I can't wait to hit the cloud of 'beingness'. Increase my practice, soothe myself with some of my favorite music and gaze out the window ~ FOR HOURS OF COMPLETE EMPTINESS. IT IS HEAVENLY!
Go ahead! Collapse into Her arms, Her embrace.
Allow the unsettling of letting go of the known.
Release the mind as you dive into the cavern of the heart.
Commit to the softening waves She send forth as you open to Her!
It is then I can be more present and open hearted with those close to me or those I encounter. It is in this re-newed balance that my creativity peaks. It is in this spaciousness I am clearer about how important it is to treat myself with love and gentleness. It is in this softness I am a better wife and friend. It is once I have let go of going, doing, striving, that I know the connection to the Sacred within, in all of Life, and re-commit to strengthening that aspect. It is in that reconnection, re-commitment, that my Trust and Faith increases. I am reminded I am truly not the one in control. It is in this re-newing that my awareness and knowing takes another leap that the Divine Feminine is indeed alive and is tapping on many of our shoulders, calling us to Wake-Up. Do our do consciously, gracefully, sometimes fiercely, and then LET GO and ride Her waves!
It is true we live a dance of the masculine and feminine. I stress the feminine side, the internal side, the dark side, the intuitive side and the Feminine fierce side of life because this is the road less traveled for most. It is a path of riches, wisdom, beauty and peace. It is too often turned away from because we like feeling revved. The rev is how we have come to define being alive. But alas, the Divine Feminine teaches us of the Mystery life which is necessary to truly be Wholy enlivened!
Blessings on the path of the Divine Feminine!
